12.19.2008

How Well Can You See?

“Do you know how to tell when a teenager is lying?”

The question immediately sparked my attention. I was sick, watching TV, and had just happened flip the channel to land on a Judge Judy show. I have always been fascinated by her, because she never gives into passion or emotion. Rather, she’s usually quite crude of the plaintiff and defendant demanding, “Just say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ – I don’t need to know the ‘whys’.”

So, “Do you know how to tell when a teenager is lying?” she continued with her authoritative demanding voice and then answered her question like it was almost a joke, “When he opens up his mouth.” My jaw flew down, and my fascination of her? Ended. I seriously wanted to get into that television and tell her what she really just said. Tell her why it’s wrong. Why she’s wrong.

So, why is she wrong? Do you know? Or maybe you agree with her? There are a lot of people who do. I’ve read on the internet how people agree with her on that statement. And there’s more – I mean, when I was starting out on my teenage life people would say to my mom, right in front of me, “Wow, good luck with her – she’s entering those years,” or “I don’t know how you do it, with a teenager in the house.” But really, how could some adults believe that that’s what teenagers do when they “talk”, or excuse me, “lie”?

First of all, yes, I am a teenager. Yes, maybe some will think I’m biased. Or hopefully they’ll dare to think that I could be representing another side. Sometimes I think the world needs to wake up – us teenagers, we mess up, sure. But for most of us, our aim isn’t to hurt, lie, and commit crime. We’re human – yes, human. And not too long ago, the people who are attacking us were teenagers too. And I’m not sure what some adults’ problem is – if they’ve forgotten what it’s like to be where we are, or if it’s that they do remember, and in remembering, they think we’re the exact teenager they once were.

However, maybe if some of these adults expected more of us, we’d give them more. Have they ever thought that the problems of some teenagers start with themselves, some of the adults? With their example? Do we, teenagers, shape all our perceptions of adults from the few who make it on the news? Then why do they sometimes do that with us? Why? Can’t they see that sometimes the nice polite teens are just that? Nice and polite? We are the future, and they’re already telling us that we’re failing?

We deserve better, because we are better than that. In fact, most of us are set on making the world better not worse. And even though some people may believe we're liars all the time, even if we aren’t, we have to keep on trying to show them that they are wrong. Not that we wouldn’t keep trying even if we didn’t need to prove anyone wrong. And yeah, they put us down, but we can keep going – don’t give up. Don’t give in. Just because people don’t expect anything from us, doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t give them something that they should expect. Chin up, you guys. Because we have each other. And we’ll be heard, because we’ve been underestimated.

And, in the end, it’s Judge Judy, and all those other people who believe we’re just liars, that are the ones missing out. Because, believe it or not, we are great. We rise above what people tell us, and keep going. We’re capable of such great things – we have done great things - and yet they choose to remain blind.

(feel free to comment! & thanks to all my followers!)

15 comments:

Ginger said...

Great Blog. =)

Glass Mannequin said...

My mind is fried, so forgive me if I ramble. (Smile, butterfly. You know how scattered I am)

I think that any adverse reactions that adults might have towards children is spawned from a constant distrust towards others or perhaps a derelict regret for actions perpetrated in the past.

What an awful statement. That teenagers lie when their mouths open. That just so fully and completely... belittles her in my mind. I mean, I've never had a lot of respect for her in regards to her show or the "cases" that she rules upon as they seem to be frivolous and odd. I think that law isn't something to be used for the entertainment of others.

The terminator.... Wait, what am I talking about?

♥MademLee♥ said...

thanks for following one of blog
you rock :)

jEeRo said...

iF teenagers lie when their mouths open doesnt that make us all teenagers?!..doesnt adults lie too maybe even more?!..its really a no-brain statement!!..
whos to say there are teenagers who are more mature than adults?!..its wrong to judge a person(teenager or not) when u dun even know him/her..i mean who are we to judge anyone?!..
it doesnt mean a teenager cant or dun have anything to teach adults..im an adult myself..but i sure dun push away teenagers..
anyway i think creative writing is more for u..cz u r an amazin writer..but do what make u happy..
thkx for your lovely comment =]

deko and posh said...

We feel teenagers have big shoes to fill! Every teen has to prove to their self and others that they can be good. The stereotype that all teens are liars, cheaters, drug users, and just bad must stop. dekoposh, Inc. was started to prove to the world that V.I.T.s (very important tweens and teens) are normal human beings with a lot of challenges who want to be successful too. Each teen must push through those stereotype's and achieve their success whatever that is and keep their dreams alive. dekoposh, Inc. is giving tweens and teens the power and the platform to become an inspiration to their peers, their parents, their schools, and the world.

We would love to add you on our blog as a column writer. We are currently looking for 11 column writers and the Column Names are located on our blog. If you would like to have your own column on our blog, pick which one and let us know at info@dekoposh.com

dekoposh, Inc. Team

Romans 12:2 said...

Your demonstrative. I like that though, especially on a subject like this. Good post. - Bob

Amira said...

hey thanks for commenting my blog, and i totally agree with your post there are so many unfair stereotypes about teens, i think many of us now feel we need to fill these type cast roles

Im in a infatuated state of mind said...

lol thanks

Rafé said...

oh no!...
A teenager trying to defend themselves is a vain attempt, since most of the time we are biased or too emotional to use logic like big people.
In the end, I simply just give up... arguing with a closed mind is like arguing with a kid.
And even Judge Judy is a show, and demographics are important.

How early did you start college then?

Flüssiger Spiegel said...

…to a certain extent agree with Rafé…
........but..........
Come on mariposa.…becoming so upset over a television show?
Don’t get me wrong, I believe your point is valid…however
………..
Who cares what people think?
Just because a whole group of people believe something, that doesn’t make it true..
Example: if thousands of people started believing that the sky was red, would that make it true?

If thousands of people believe that all teenagers are liars etc., does that make it true?

Of course not. Everyone is entitled to some kind of opinion.
Don’t let what others think or say get you down…you’ll be much happier that way.
In any case…good post.
Now prove to people that your better than some stereotype; I’m know you can

Sy said...

Judge Judy...I can't stand that lady!

Yeah hope your dentist never mentions wisdom teeth! It'll be a bummer of a day lol!

YERIKA said...

your blog is AWESOME, too =]

James said...

I agree with you! I mean we teenagers are just humans and humans make mistakes! I mean sure, they should understand since they were like us once, but no. They just judge all of us as a whole, and decide to not notice the good in the individuals. I like ur blog, so please keep posting, and maybe one day, you can read my blogs. ^_^

Okie said...

I haven't watched Judge Judy in a long while...but she was the more entertaining of the "judge" shows. I'm not terribly surprised to hear that she said what you said she said. I would dispute your claim that she "never gives into passion or emotion". She is a bucket of passion and emotion...but her passion is to be outrageous and sensationalistic...to behave as though everything is completely black and white...as though it's possible for humans to judge without bias or subjectivity. She is all about chastising everybody and sitting on her bench with her holier than thou attitude. Sometimes I agreed with her and other times I thought she was a pompous idiot.

As to the expansion of your post, I do indeed know people of that opinion...that teenagers are just bubbles of lying, deceitful, self-centered energy with their only goal being to party hard and ruin any moral framework put in place for them.

Naturally, that is a HUGE over-simplification.

Truly, I have known some teenagers with a complete devil-may-care attitude. But the majority of the teenagers I've known in my life and know now...are the same as most people I know...humans.

Nobody has it all figured out. Nobody is perfect. Nobody is 100% truthful or altruistic all the time. In fact, depending on which philosophical argument you subscribe to, it could be argued, that EVERYONE lies 100% of the time since it's not possible to fully comprehend truth (but I'll save that for another discussion altogether).

The only difference between your average teenager and your average adult is the passage of time. Generally speaking, an average adult has more life experience to draw on which could theoretically mean the adult makes more informed decisions (that doesn't mean they're better decisions).

Teenagers get a bum rap far too often. The reason? The real reason (as I see it)?

Adults feel threatened by teenagers. Up until adolescent, the teenager is a 'child' to be cared for, taught, molded and controlled by the adult/parent/world. As the child moves into adolescence, he/she is coming to the realization that he/she has self-will, has power in the world. The child...is becoming an adult.

Because the child has new and different perspective from the adult, the teenage motivations and actions are necessarily somewhat different from those of the adult. That's just the natural order of things due to the passage of time and the evolution of society.

Adults are threatened by teenagers because it means they (the adults) are getting older and losing control on the society that they've molded and controlled for the past few decades. Once the teenager becomes an adult-proper, that teenager will have the power to change society in ways the current adults don't approve of.

I've recently been helping test a training course talking about generational differences in the workplace. As a very small example of adults being threatened by youth...a man in his ~40s-50s is commenting on the disrespectful nature of the young workers being hired at his firm...they're disrespectful because they don't want to wear a necktie...don't feel bad about taking a day off for non-emergencies...spend time in meetings multi-tasking...etc., etc., etc. Meanwhile, the young employee complains against the strict environment of the older workers...they want to force a dress code on them...force them to work 'by the hour' rather than 'by the job'...aren't willing to "get with the times" on new technologies...etc, etc., etc.

Adults and teenagers each have completely different perspectives. Unfortunately, instead of trying to understand each others' perspectives, the communication often deteriorates until a wall is put up on each side and nasty accusations are thrown.

Teenagers don't lie all the time any more than adults do. But neither adults nor teenagers fully understand each other and thus misperceptions can be interpreted as intentions to mislead.

We may never see eye to eye...but if we try to look through the eye of the other, it's a good start.

Brii333 said...

i totally agree. people seem to think that just becuase i'm fifteen years old i automatically lie and drink and do mind-numbing drugs...well, i do drink, when i have the occasion to, but not as much as people think i do. and drugs? pointless, especially the ones like meth, coke, and heroine. and the truth? i feel so utterly guilty when i lie, i just CAN'T. it pisses me off when people, including my family members, group me with those who live life by deception.

and anyway, i know adults that lie a lot more then teenagers. it seems to me that adults lie MORE then us, because...well, i don't know why. but i'm on a quest to find the answer!!!! MUAHAHAHAA!!! uncovering the secrets of adults... paybacks a bitch, assholes. :)